Post by halsca on Jul 30, 2005 13:10:34 GMT -5
Years ago I used be a delivery driver for a wholesale meat market. The pay kind of sucked but the hours and benefits were great and the constant lifting kept me in pretty good shape. I delivered mostly to restaurants and bars.
One of my stops was a auto racing themed restaurant where the waitresses wore hot pants knee high boots and little halter tops. Perfect stuck ware as far as I’m concerned. I would unload their order and the bar girl who happened to be related to the owner would check out what I brought before I’d put it into the freezer.
The procedure was always the same except on this day I decided to leave a sticky surprise for her. By the way this girl was hot but I didn’t really like her that much. In the past we had trouble with this place claiming that they didn’t get all the goods promised. We felt it was employee theft on their end but couldn’t even begin to prove it, I pretty much KNEW that this girl was behind it on account of the fact she was a serious cocaine user. This is why we had them check out their order and sign for it OUTSIDE before stocking up the freezer, by the way if a customer’s order came up short the driver made up for it out of his own pocket.
Drivers were only paid 65 dollars a day, a sirloin shoulder cost 27 dollars back then you can see what I’m getting at, the girl wasn’t too popular amongst us grunts but what can you do? Go to the owner of the place and call his niece a coke fiend and a thief, I think not, we’d only end up loosing a customer.
Anyway I unloaded their order onto a cart that the restaurant provided and dropped a nice big wad of gum by it; it was a very hot day perfect for gum. I then rang the bell and out came this girl dressed in her sexy little outfit. We walked up to the cart together and she started checking out the goods. It was very easy to maneuver her over to where my gum was and she stepped in it big time.
She gasped then lifted and scraped her thoroughly gum stuck sticky stringy boot then started cussing about it, it was a sight to see believe me. Every time she lifted her gummy boot off the ground it had what looked like hundreds of long sticky strands of gum hanging off of it. She whined about how much those boots cost her and how long it was going to take her to clean all the gum off them.
She knew the gum was mine and told me so. She called me an inconsiderate slob and told me that she was out there a while before and there wasn’t any gum around. I played innocent; I told her that anyone could have dropped it there but said I was sorry anyway. She calmed down and after a few final scrapes of her gummy boot we went back inside and I stocked the freezer and left.
She made my day big time; the look on her face and the way the girl wiggled and jiggled as she stomped and scraped her boots was truly spectacular. I was a happy man until I got back to the market. My boss gave me hell for it, the girl complained to her uncle saying that I was a slob for spitting a big nasty wad of gum out on their receiving area and laughing at her when she stepped in it. She lied, I didn’t laugh at her, and I was quite sympathetic, I even offered to help her clean it up.
Anyway my boss told me that if anyone complains about me leaving trash behind on any of my stops again he’d fire me. As I look back on it years later it sort of was a dumb thing to try even though I got away with it. There simply wasn’t enough foot traffic behind that restaurant to really make it seem like a random event, that and I also have a feeling that she probably smelled the gum on my breath.
Since that day I’ve always made sure to throughly chew out all the flavor hence the odor of my gum before dropping it. You know it also helps if you are drinking some sort of beverage to help rinse out your mouth too. There’s nothing like the smell of gum on your breath to point an incriminating finger at yourself.
You know everybody always tells about their successes but I think that I’ve been the only one that has confessed to a screw up now and then. I would love to hear some similar stories. ;D
One of my stops was a auto racing themed restaurant where the waitresses wore hot pants knee high boots and little halter tops. Perfect stuck ware as far as I’m concerned. I would unload their order and the bar girl who happened to be related to the owner would check out what I brought before I’d put it into the freezer.
The procedure was always the same except on this day I decided to leave a sticky surprise for her. By the way this girl was hot but I didn’t really like her that much. In the past we had trouble with this place claiming that they didn’t get all the goods promised. We felt it was employee theft on their end but couldn’t even begin to prove it, I pretty much KNEW that this girl was behind it on account of the fact she was a serious cocaine user. This is why we had them check out their order and sign for it OUTSIDE before stocking up the freezer, by the way if a customer’s order came up short the driver made up for it out of his own pocket.
Drivers were only paid 65 dollars a day, a sirloin shoulder cost 27 dollars back then you can see what I’m getting at, the girl wasn’t too popular amongst us grunts but what can you do? Go to the owner of the place and call his niece a coke fiend and a thief, I think not, we’d only end up loosing a customer.
Anyway I unloaded their order onto a cart that the restaurant provided and dropped a nice big wad of gum by it; it was a very hot day perfect for gum. I then rang the bell and out came this girl dressed in her sexy little outfit. We walked up to the cart together and she started checking out the goods. It was very easy to maneuver her over to where my gum was and she stepped in it big time.
She gasped then lifted and scraped her thoroughly gum stuck sticky stringy boot then started cussing about it, it was a sight to see believe me. Every time she lifted her gummy boot off the ground it had what looked like hundreds of long sticky strands of gum hanging off of it. She whined about how much those boots cost her and how long it was going to take her to clean all the gum off them.
She knew the gum was mine and told me so. She called me an inconsiderate slob and told me that she was out there a while before and there wasn’t any gum around. I played innocent; I told her that anyone could have dropped it there but said I was sorry anyway. She calmed down and after a few final scrapes of her gummy boot we went back inside and I stocked the freezer and left.
She made my day big time; the look on her face and the way the girl wiggled and jiggled as she stomped and scraped her boots was truly spectacular. I was a happy man until I got back to the market. My boss gave me hell for it, the girl complained to her uncle saying that I was a slob for spitting a big nasty wad of gum out on their receiving area and laughing at her when she stepped in it. She lied, I didn’t laugh at her, and I was quite sympathetic, I even offered to help her clean it up.
Anyway my boss told me that if anyone complains about me leaving trash behind on any of my stops again he’d fire me. As I look back on it years later it sort of was a dumb thing to try even though I got away with it. There simply wasn’t enough foot traffic behind that restaurant to really make it seem like a random event, that and I also have a feeling that she probably smelled the gum on my breath.
Since that day I’ve always made sure to throughly chew out all the flavor hence the odor of my gum before dropping it. You know it also helps if you are drinking some sort of beverage to help rinse out your mouth too. There’s nothing like the smell of gum on your breath to point an incriminating finger at yourself.
You know everybody always tells about their successes but I think that I’ve been the only one that has confessed to a screw up now and then. I would love to hear some similar stories. ;D
